Reaching revenue goals, growing teams, and establishing strategic alliances are all accomplishments that we all enjoy celebrating. But what about the soft skills that keep everything from collapsing like a house of cards? These abilities, which are frequently disregarded, are the cornerstone of successful leadership.
This insight led me down a rabbit hole of readings, articles, and introspection. I’ve experienced my share of “Well, that could have gone better” moments along the way. I’ve discovered seven undervalued but essential leadership skills via trial and error and extensive introspection. These are the lessons I’ve learnt, some of which have come from challenging situations, and how they have shaped my leadership development.
Self-Awareness: Understanding Who You Are Before You Damage Them
Because I had a title and a team, I thought I was an excellent leader early in my career. However, influence—which begins with self-awareness—is what leadership is all about, not titles. When I discovered that my team didn’t always see me the way I did, I had to learn this lesson the hard way.
In his book Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman emphasises that the cornerstone of successful leadership is self-awareness. This required me to face my blind spots. I used to take great satisfaction in my ability to listen, for instance, until I noticed that I was nodding in agreement with a teammate as I was composing an email in my head. It was a wake-up call. I now deliberately try to stop, pay attention, and actively participate. It’s incredible how much more connected and capable I’ve become as a leader.
Communication: KISS stands for “Keep It Simple, Stupid.”
Have you ever attempted to explain a difficult tactic and been met with blank looks? Yes, I agree. A senior leader once asked, “So… what do we actually need to do?” after I presented a growth plan that was full of industry jargon. It was a moment of humility.
In their book Made to Stick, Chip and Dan Heath make the case that concepts that are straightforward and tangible are more likely to stick. Since then, I’ve changed my communication style to “KISS.” I know I’m headed in the right direction if my 7-year-old daughter can roughly comprehend my plan. In addition to improving my communication skills, simplifying my message has increased my effectiveness as a leader.
Making Decisions: There Is Analysis Paralysis
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”
Theodore Roosevelt
I’ll be honest: I tend to overthink things. I waited until I was “100% sure” before agreeing to a partnership deal early in my career. The chance had passed by the time I made up my mind. I learnt a valuable lesson from that experience: not every choice has to be flawless.
In The Everything Store, Jeff Bezos presents the idea of “Type 1 and Type 2 decisions.” Most Type 2 decisions can be changed later, but Type 1 decisions cannot be changed. “What could possibly go wrong?” I ask myself now. I make the call and proceed if the response isn’t disastrous. In addition to saving me from innumerable lost opportunities, it is liberating.
Resilience: Getting Back Up with Style
“Do not judge me by my success, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.”
Nelson Mandela
Being a leader is not for the weak of heart. Plans have gone awry, team members have abruptly left, and last-minute deals have fallen through. I initially took every failure personally. However, I’ve discovered that resilience is more about how quickly you bounce back from setbacks than it is about avoiding them.
In her book Grit, Angela Duckworth makes the case that resilience, rather than just talent, is a more accurate indicator of long-term success. I now take a deep breath, gather myself, and ask myself, “What’s the next best step?” when something goes wrong. It’s a survival skill as well as a leadership one.
Empowerment: You Don’t Have to Know Everything
I used to think that having all the answers was necessary to be a leader. Note that this isn’t true. In actuality, trying to know everything can actually impede the advancement of your team. I once oversaw a project to the point where my team completely stopped deliberating. It served as a warning.
True empowerment, according to Simon Sinek in Leaders Eat Last, is about trusting your team to take responsibility rather than merely assigning tasks. I now concentrate on establishing a setting where my group can try new things, fail, and grow. The outcome? a team that is more capable, creative, and involved.
Adaptability: Since the only thing that is constant is change
“Irrelevance will be even less appealing to you if you dislike change.” This saying, which is frequently credited to Eric Shinseki, has come to represent me. Adaptability is a necessity in the fast-paced world of today, not just a nice-to-have.
I’ve witnessed whole industries change in an instant, and the successful leaders were those who adjusted fast. In The Lean Startup, Eric Ries stresses the value of iterating in response to feedback. More times than I can remember, I’ve had to change my market-entry tactics, and each time, flexibility was the difference between success and failure.
Integrity: Little Things Build Trust
Being consistent in the little, routine things is what integrity is all about, not big, showy gestures. In The Speed of Trust, Stephen M.R. Covey makes the case that trustworthy behaviour fosters trust.
Leaders I’ve worked with have talked a lot about transparency but shied away from difficult discussions. Those who show up, fulfil their commitments, and take responsibility for their mistakes, no matter how minor, are the leaders I look up to the most. Since trust is the currency of leadership, I try to do the same.
In summary, leadership is a process rather than a final goal
As I consider these seven abilities, I am reminded that progress, not perfection, is what leadership is all about. I get it right sometimes. On other days, I believe, “Well, that was a learning experience.” However, by concentrating on these undervalued abilities, I have developed personally as well as as a leader.
Therefore, if you’re like me and constantly looking to get better, keep in mind that action beats overthinking, flexibility beats rigidity, and simplicity beats complexity. Additionally, we ought to start including these abilities in our leadership playbooks, or at the very least, on our resumes.
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